That? Is not fair. I don\u2019t know about you, but I can have a million successes each day (I woke up alive! I made the best cup of coffee known to mankind! I wrote a sentence I could be proud of and wouldn\u2019t mind other people reading! I knitted a row without stabbing myself with the needle and bleeding to death!) but that one thing I screw up makes me feel like the amazing things don\u2019t count. The scale isn\u2019t affected by the airy happy things I place on the success side, and then it cracks in half with the weight of that awkwardly worded email I sent in which I accidentally hurt someone\u2019s feelings.<\/p>\n
So hey. Let\u2019s do things differently this year.<\/p>\n
Throw away the scale. <\/strong><\/p>\n Let\u2019s NOT tally up our successes and failures. Failure will win because it\u2019s big and loud and hulk-smashy. Success (with its fairy wings and gossamer breath) will get pummeled and then go hide in the bathroom to cry.<\/p>\n Screw that.<\/p>\n If you just have to make a year-end tally, write down what you\u2019re proud of this year. Things like: If your fingers get itchy to list the failures, DON\u2019T. Break the pencil and marvel at your own strength. You already spent enough time on what didn\u2019t go well\u2014I know you did. From enormous impossible things like not saying the right thing before a loved one died to tiny silly things like only remembering to put eyeliner on one eye: You have spent enough time hurting.<\/p>\n Forgive yourself like you would forgive the person you love most. Don\u2019t spend time \u201clearning\u201d from it \u2014 you did that already without even having to try. Be kind to yourself. In three weeks let\u2019s turn the calendar page without fanfare. Last January we thought we had a whole year to finally get things right, but come on. What a burden to place on a brand new year. What was really true was that we noticed where we were in time. We can do that any old day. Let\u2019s do that today, December 10th. Or September 17th. Or February 3rd.<\/p>\n Every day is a good day to notice where you are, right now.<\/p>\n Celebrate your successes because they are daily and many and they are spectacular<\/em>.<\/p>\n
\n\u2022\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 At your day job, you didn\u2019t smack a single person.
\n\u2022\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Your blueberry muffins disappear from the kitchen within seconds.
\n\u2022\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You made someone laugh until they cried.
\n\u2022\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Your socks matched more days than they didn\u2019t.
\n\u2022\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You started that novel, and now you have more words written than you did last year.<\/p>\n![\"Rachael](\"http:\/\/thewritespot.us\/marlenecullenblog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/Rachael-Herron.jpg\")
<\/a>RACHAEL HERRON<\/a><\/strong> is the bestselling author of the novel\u00a0Splinters of Light<\/em>\u00a0and\u00a0Pack Up the Moon\u00a0<\/em>(both from Penguin), the five-book Cypress Hollow series, and the memoir,\u00a0A Life in Stitches<\/em>.\u00a0She received her MFA in writing from Mills College, and when she\u2019s not busy writing, she\u2019s working her other full-time job as a 911 fire\/medical dispatcher for a Bay Area fire department. She\u2019s a New Zealand citizen as well as an American, and she\u00a0is a proud member of the\u00a0NaNoWriMo Writers Board<\/a>. She can probably play along with you on the ukulele.<\/p>\n