An inspiring message from Gurdeep Pandher
The human mind tends to focus on painful memories while letting positive ones fade. These distressing memories become our heaviest burden, causing ongoing emotional pain.
How much of our past can we carry with us through life’s journey? This is a profound question that affects everyone in different ways. The past resides within our memories like a vast collection of stories, each one leaving its unique impression upon our consciousness. These memories manifest in various forms — from the radiantly joyful moments that warm our hearts, to the mundane yet comfortable memories of everyday life, to the deeply sorrowful experiences, and finally to those truly tormenting recollections that seem to pierce our very soul.
When we carry these memories forward naturally, allowing them to exist without judgment, it should theoretically be manageable. However, human nature often leads us down a different path. We tend to automatically focus on the painful memories while letting the positive or neutral ones fade into the background. The heaviest burden we bear comes from those tormenting memories — the ones that inflict suffering, burden our hearts, and generate persistent emotional pain. Even as we experience significant personal growth and positive changes in our present circumstances, these fragments of our past, particularly the painful ones, create a barrier that prevents us from fully embracing and experiencing our current life.
I’ve witnessed this unfold countless times in matters of the heart. Picture pristine relationships — couples painting their futures with vibrant strokes of hope, individuals discovering new love with fresh canvas in hand — only to watch as the shadows of their past gradually seep through, staining their masterpiece with doubt and fear. But here’s a fascinating thought that changed my perspective: our past is like a phantom theater, existing only in the projection room of our minds. Its power flows solely from the energy we feed it, like a ghostly performance that continues only as long as we keep the projector running. The moment we dim those lights, the show begins to fade, and we rediscover our power to write new stories.
Like unwanted guests crashing a peaceful evening, memories have a peculiar way of barging into our minds uninvited. They pirouette through our consciousness — a carousel of faces spinning past: the high school friend whose laughter still echoes, the barista who knew our coffee order by heart, the stranger whose kindness touched us on that rainy afternoon. But it’s not just people who make surprise appearances in this impromptu theater of remembrance. The trees from our childhood playground, the cherished dog who died, the cat that once shared our lunch, the creaky garden gate that marked our homecomings — they all take their turn on memory’s stage, tugging at the curtains of our present with persistent hands.
Imagine your mind as a traveler, carrying a weathered suitcase filled with memories. This faithful companion — your emotional baggage — accompanies you everywhere, from sun-kissed beaches to snow-capped mountains, its familiar weight a constant presence at your side. But what if we could transform this heavy burden into something lighter, something that enriches rather than exhausts? The answer lies not in attempting to abandon our past — for it is as much a part of us as our own shadow — but in learning to dance with it gracefully. Like a skilled alchemist, we must learn to transmute these memories, both golden and leaden, into wisdom. For our past, unchangeable as the stars above, stands as a silent testament to our journey. When we finally embrace this truth, accepting each chapter of our story without resistance, we begin to feel the weight of that old suitcase gradually lifting from our shoulders.
Click “Our Past” to read the rest of this article posted on The Gurdeep Magazine on Substack, April 23, 2025.
Note from Gurdeep
I’ve chosen to keep my articles free to ensure they remain accessible to everyone, regardless of their income. I don’t wish to create barriers for those facing financial hardship. If you have stable employment and a steady income, though, I trust you’ll read my articles as a paid subscriber.
Gurdeep Pandher is a Bhangra dance artist. He creates dance videos in nature/outdoors and performances that bring people together. He is best known for spreading joy, hope and positivity during the pandemic.
Note from Marlene
Use Gurdeep’s thoughts as a springboard to write your story. Click on Healing for self-care ideas when writing about difficult topics.
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