Guest blogger Terry Elders writes about rejection, dejection, and perfection.
Luck was on my side. My first submission to an anthology, just eight years ago, got accepted by Chicken Soup for the Soul for “Celebrating Brothers and Sisters.” Since then my stories have appeared in well over a hundred books. But I estimate that I’ve averaged five rejections for every acceptance. That’s a success rate of only 20 percent. Perseverance is key.
I write for an audience. I’ve known talented writing students say that if they’re ever rejected, they become too discouraged to continue to submit. When I told this to a realtor friend, he laughed.
“That’s ridiculous. I get turned down every day. If I stopped showing houses, I’d never make a sale. You smile and move on to the next potential customer.”
I agree. I’ve adopted my late husband’s favorite motto, “Never, ever give up.”
I keep an orphanage in my stories file. Here’s where all my rejects dwell. Periodically I spot an opportunity that’s perfect for a story that’s languished in the orphanage for years. I apply a little literary rouge and send it out again.
At first I wrote stories that I thought would make people smile or nod or become inspired. As I grew older, my inner voices urged, “Go deeper.”
I started with “Dreaming as the Summers Die,” about the last time I saw my birth mom. “Not suited for our audience,” said a couple of traditional anthology publishers. When I read these messages, I could feel the distaste, the pulling back, and I envisioned how I’d spoiled some editor’s morning. Even a friend who read my story suggested I should concentrate on more cheerful topics, and that perhaps I’d better get over something that happened all those decades ago.
But I persevered and resubmitted. I wanted to see this story in print. It finally found a home in Dream of Things’ debut anthology collection, Saying Goodbye. An online magazine, The Fertile Source, also printed it, and Five Minutes More picked it up. And additionally the story appeared again in Joy, Interrupted, from Fat Daddy’s Farm. How encouraging to find that not every publisher shies away from more meditative pieces.
I continued with “A Ruffled Mind,” about what it was like to be six years old and scared witless by crossing the street or going to the playground. This story appeared in Anxiety Disorders: True Stories of Survival by Hidden Thoughts Press.
Once I began edging toward the dark side, I gained courage. Did I want anybody to know why I held on to a hopeless love for years and years? Did I want anybody to know how diminished I felt when my tiny little adoptive mom called me an elephant? What about those feelings of resentment during my late husband’s last weeks? Shouldn’t I be ashamed? Filled with guilt? Maybe not, I decided. Maybe others have shared those experiences. So I wrote those stories, too. And they were published.
“Needs” appeared in Jonna Ivin’s Loving for Crumbs, “Elephants Never Forget” in Virgie Tovar’s Seal Press publication, Hot and Heavy: Fierce Fat Girls on Life, Love and Fashion, and “Wheels and Deals” in Hidden Thoughts Press, It’s Weighing on Your Mind.
I don’t dwell on the dark side a hundred percent of the time, though. I still write inspirational stories and submit to Chicken Soup. I’ve had 25 stories accepted by that publisher. I’ve also had eight stories cut by Chicken Soup at the final moment. That doesn’t stop me from submitting to nearly each new possible title posted on its website.
Further, since the nonfiction anthology market has diminished in recent years, I am considering fiction. I know where to start for ideas. I’m betting there are a few orphans that can be spiffed up through imagination.
Maybe with perseverance, luck will nestle up to me once again. There’s still room in my bookcase for a few more anthologies with a story carrying my byline.
TERRI ELDERS, LCSW, began writing for publication in her early teens. Her nonfiction stories have appeared in over a hundred anthologies, including multiple editions of the Chicken Soup for the Soul and Not Your Mother’s Book series. She co-edited Not Your Mother’s Book…On Travel.
After a nearly three-decade odyssey, she recently returned to her native California. She’s happy to be back near her son, old friends, and her beloved Pacific Ocean. She blogs at A Touch of Tarragon.
