It’s after the holidays, when some of us spent time with family.
It’s inauguration day. Lots of energy. Lots of emotions.
Today’s prompt, “How we affect others,” is something I’ve been thinking about for awhile.
We don’t live in a bubble, immune to the thoughts and emotions of others.
Today, I suggest writing about how we affect others.
If that doesn’t work for you, how about: Do we affect others? What does that mean?
I look forward to your response.
Guest Blogger, attorney Helen Sedwick, writes:
In exploring the journeys of their lives, they delve into the private (and imperfect) lives of others. Can a memoirist write about surviving abuse without getting sued by her abuser? Can a soldier write about war crimes without risking a court-martial?
Yes, but a cool head is key.
Considering the thousands of memoirs published each year, there are relatively few lawsuits. Claims are difficult and expensive to prove. Most targets don’t want to call attention to a matter best forgotten.
However, it’s important for memoir writers to be aware of the legal risks. You can’t avoid risk 100% of the time, but you can learn to take the ones that are important to your narrative arc and minimize those that are not.
You may write about a person in a positive or neutral light. For instance, you don’t need permission to thank someone by name in your acknowledgments or to mention non-controversial information, such as the name of your fifth-grade teacher.
You may use historical names to establish context. If you are writing a memoir about the summer of 1969, you may mention Neil Armstrong and the moon landing and talk about your crush on Cat Stevens or Grace Slick.
You may speak ill of the dead. Claims of defamation and privacy die with a person.
When you are publishing information about identifiable, living people and that information could be seriously embarrassing, damaging to their reputation, or subject them to public hatred and score, then you need to consider the risks of defamation and invasion of privacy. I am not talking about portraying your mother-in-law as bossy; I am talking about portraying your mother-in-law as a drug dealer.
Here’s a quick summary of United States law. (The laws of other countries are more favorable to the targets.)
To prove defamation, whether libel for written statements or slander for spoken ones, a plaintiff (target) must prove all of the following:
False Statement of Fact:
If a statement is true, then it is not defamatory no matter how offensive or embarrassing (although privacy issues must be considered, as I discuss below). Opinions are protected because they are not “facts.” If you post a restaurant review stating a meal was so bad you gagged, that is an opinion. But one restaurant critic was sued for saying a stringy steak tasted like horsemeat. The plaintiff claimed the reference to horsemeat was a statement of fact and not a colorfully stated opinion. Satire is not defamatory if the absurdity is so clear that a reasonable person would not think the statement is true.
Of an Identifiable, Living Person, Group, or Company:
A defamatory statement must contain sufficient information to lead a reasonable person (other than the target) to identify the target. Typically, the target must be a living person, but organizations have sued for defamation. Oprah Winfrey was sued by a group of Texas ranchers after saying she had sworn off hamburgers because of mad cow disease. (Oprah won the case.)
That is Published:
One person (other than the target) must read or hear the statement.
Causes reputational harm:
The statement must be more than offensive, insulting, or inflammatory. It must “tend to bring the subject into public hatred, ridicule, contempt, or negatively affect its business or occupation.” Statements involving crimes, loathsome diseases, professional incompetence, corruption, impotence, or promiscuity are automatically considered harmful.
Made With Actual Malice or Negligence:
If the target is a public figure, then the target must prove the statement was made with actual knowledge that it was false or with a reckless disregard for the truth. If the target is against a private individual, courts generally require some carelessness or fault by the writer.
Even if you publish the truth, you may still be sued for unauthorized disclosure of private facts if you disclose private information that is embarrassing or unpleasant about an identifiable, living person and is offensive to ordinary sensibilities and not of overriding public interest.
Private Information:
The target must have a reasonable expectation of privacy. Any conduct in public is not protected, particularly today when everyone carries cameras in their pockets. Conversely, there may be issues your family doesn’t talk about, such as your uncle’s drinking problem, that are not private if your uncle has been convicted in public court of DUIs.
That is Offensive:
The disclosure must be more than embarrassing; it must be so offensive that it harms a person’s personal and professional reputation. Typically, these cases involve incest, rape, abuse, or a serious disease or impairment. Sex videos have triggered a number of suits.
And Not of Public Interest:
Even if the information is highly offensive, courts often decide there is no legal liability if the information is of public interest. Public interest does not mean high-brow or intellectual. Gossip, smut, and just about anything about celebrities is of public interest. Frequently, courts find stories of abuse and incest to be of public interest if they are disclosed by the victims. Judges and juries are not sympathetic when the perpetrator makes a privacy claim.
And Unauthorized.
You can avoid these issues by getting permission from people appearing in your memoir. An email will do. But avoid giving someone the right to approve your manuscript. It’s your story. If your sister remembers the past differently, she should write her own memoir.
Ask yourself whether you are subject to other limitations.
If any of these apply to you, consult with an attorney about your options.
And most importantly, keep a check on your motives. Publishing a memoir is not a chance to get even with somebody by skewering them like a voodoo doll. A memoir is about you, the writer. It’s an opportunity to explore your heart, your character, and your truth.
To learn more about minimizing the legal risks of memoir writing, download my presentation at Fall 2016 Telesummit: The Heart and Soul of Memoir Audio Downloads.
Helen Sedwick is an author and California attorney with thirty years of experience representing businesses and entrepreneurs. Publisher’s Weekly lists her Self-Publisher’s Legal Handbook as one of the top five resource books for independent authors.
Helen’s blog coaches writers on everything from saving on taxes to avoiding scams.
Disclaimer: Helen Sedwick is an attorney licensed to practice in California only. This information is general in nature and should not be used as a substitute for the advice of an attorney authorized to practice in your jurisdiction.
Guest Blogger Suzanne Murray writes:
Amid what seems like a world gone mad, can you relax, take a deep breath and consider the possibility that all that is happening around us, that seems so disturbing, is really an opportunity for so many to awaken to the divine spark within each of us? The place that holds the light and the creative solutions our world so very much needs.
This, I suspect, is what Albert Einstein meant when he said that the problems we face won’t be solved by the same level of thinking that created them. We need instead to approach the monumental challenges we face in our lives and the world from the level of our heart, soul and spirit. We need to work with our creative imagination which is really our hotline to the divine. From here we can respond to situations from a place of love that we are rather than the grip of fear that events can trigger.
The start of a new year fully invites us to consider new possibilities. Like the blank slate, the blank page, the blank canvas of our lives we can ask what do we want to create for ourselves and the world. We have the opportunity to let go of the idea that what has happened yesterday determines our today. We can break out of our habit patterns that feel safe, if not satisfying, and open to a sense of wonder at what we could choose to create. One way to get started is to practice being more present in each moment. Release regrets that keep us stuck in the past and let go of our worries that launch us into a future that doesn’t exist. The Now moment is really the place of creation where miracles can occur. It is also a place of real peace. To spend time in the present we have to let go of relying on our minds and the urge to try and figure everything out.
When we focus on the moment we more readily find ourselves in the flow of the universe. As we relax and allow the answers and solutions will come in wondrous ways. A flash of inspiration, an unexpected gift or a chance meeting with someone who can help us. We learn to tap the deep intelligence of our heart that speaks to us in the form of intuition, that felt sense of what to do now, now and now. We follow it like a breadcrumb trail home to our true selves and the inspired life that helps heal our world.
We may need to heal the repressed feelings and emotions that we hold in our bodies and energy fields that can cloud our clarity and keep us from easily accessing these deeper ways of knowing. Yet the development over the past twenty years of many different energy psychologies like EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques), that I have had such wonderful success with, make this emotional housecleaning so much easier and graceful, allowing us to open to more of who we really are and step out of our comfort zone to create the new.
Everywhere I go I meet people tapping into their creative impulses and their spiritual spark, in small and large ways, to help build a new world from this inspired place. This is the great possibility of 2017. What if as you live more from your heart and knowing and use your creative imagination this new year can be your best year ever? What new life and world are you ready to create?
Suzanne Murray is a gifted creativity and writing coach, soul-based life coach, writer, poet, EFT practitioner and intuitive healer committed to empowering others to find the freedom to ignite their creative fire, unleash their imagination and engage their creative expression in every area of their lives.
As a Creativity Coach she helps others explore and support their creative self in whatever form it takes and to discover ways to live a more creative life. Offering The Heart of Writing Coaching and Classes since 1991, she brings to her work with writers a passion for words and an ability to inspire others to write and experience the writing process.. As an EFT Practitioner she enjoys working with these simple, powerful technique to help others shift out of limiting patterns and embrace a life they love.
Committed to the power of Sacred Travel she leads small groups to Ireland, a place that offer a strong sense of the magnificent and mystical.
You might know that I facilitate Jumpstart writing workshops. One day, a participant read her freewrite which contained the phrase, “Despair and broken promises.” I immediately thought that would make a great writing prompt. What do you think?
And that reminds me, during this season of many deaths, if you need to write a condolence note and are stymied about what to write, take a look at “The Condolence Note – What to Write.” You might get some ideas.
Today’s writing prompt: Despair and broken promises.
Post your writing on The Write Spot Blog and I’ll offer commentary . . . always positive.
Do you have a favorite recipe?
Write about that recipe . . . where did the recipe come from? What kind of occasion did you have it?
Photo: Fried eggs on top of sauteed kale on top of grits, sausage patty on the side. Yum! My new favorite recipe inspired by a trip to Athens, Georgia, where every meal was delicious!
Poet Mary Oliver was born in 1935 in Maple Heights, Ohio. She had an unhappy childhood and spent most of her time outside, wandering around the woods, reading and writing poems.
From the time she was young, she knew that writers didn’t make very much money, so she sat down and made a list of all the things in life she would never be able to have — a nice car, fancy clothes, and eating out at expensive restaurants. But Mary decided she wanted to be a poet anyway.
Mary tried college, but dropped out. She made a pilgrimage to visit Edna St. Vincent Millay’s 800-acre estate in Austerlitz, New York. The poet had been dead for several years, but Millay’s sister Norma lived there. Mary and Norma hit it off, and Mary lived there for years, helping out on the estate, keeping Norma company, and working on her own writing.
Mary said: “I was very careful never to take an interesting job. I took lots of jobs. But if you have an interesting job you get interested in it. I also began in those years to keep early hours. … If anybody has a job and starts at 9, there’s no reason why they can’t get up at 4:30 or 5 and write for a couple of hours, and give their employers their second-best effort of the day — which is what I did.”
She published five books of poetry, and still almost no one had heard of her. She doesn’t remember ever having given a reading before 1984, which is the year that she was doing dishes one evening when the phone rang and it was someone calling to tell her that her most recent book, American Primitive (1983), had won the Pulitzer Prize. Suddenly, she was famous. She didn’t really like the fame — she didn’t give many interviews, didn’t want to be in the news.
When responding to a writing prompt, you are completely free to write the absolute truth, with no worries about what anyone will think. You are also free to write fiction. You have the freedom to write whatever you want . . . these writings are called freewrites.
There are over 300 prompts on The Write Spot Blog. You can choose one at any time and just write.
Sometimes our writing takes us to memories from our childhood, a very powerful place that is important and so intoxicating.
From Writers Dreaming, by Naomi Epel, chapter by James W. Hall:
“One of the things that I’ve discovered through reading a lot of best-sellers, studying a lot of popular fiction for courses that I’ve given at the university, is that there are certain recurrent, mythic qualities in books that we could consider, from an elitist academic viewpoint, to be pulp or low-life, mass-market fiction. But obviously they have a certain kind of power or else three million people wouldn’t buy and be excited about them. One of the things I found out was that there were these recurrent patterns. One, for instance, that I feel has a kind of mythic quality, is what I came to call, in a particular class on bestsellers, “the golden place.” This is where the novel begins to picture a time and place, usually both of those, where the grass was greener, the flowers smelled better, the birds chirped more purely and everything was simply better. Usually associated with childhood and long ago. It’s a form of nostalgia, I suppose, but when you see it in a fictional form it has a tremendous power to call us to our best, ideal selves. We feel in ourselves that such golden places are possible to return to, to reacquire, to rediscover and I think that one of the hungers we bring to the reading experience is to go to other people’s golden places and live there, temporarily. A place that is coherent, that makes sense, where values are still valuable and ideals are possible to achieve.”
Note from Marlene: Our freewrites are much like what Hall describes – when we go back in memory, we touch “the golden place” and “nostalgia” — a place where the reader/listener wants to live where you did and do what you did— and that speaks to the power of writing.
Your writing has “. . . in a fictional form. . . a tremendous power. . . “
So, keep writing. Write for yourself with no judging nor critiquing. Just Write.
The mission of Outside magazine:To inspire active participation in the world outside through award-winning coverage of the people, sports, places, adventure, discoveries, healthy and fitness, gear and apparel, trends, and events that make up an active lifestyle.
Outside is a monthly national magazine dedicated to covering the people, sports and activities, politics, art, literature, and hardware of the outdoors. Although our features are usually assigned to a regular stable of experienced and proven writers, we’re always interested in new authors and their ideas. In particular, we look for articles on outdoor events, regions, and activities; informative seasonal service pieces; sports and adventure travel pieces; profiles of engaging outdoor characters; and investigative stories on environmental issues.
Queries should present a clear, original, and provocative thesis, not merely a topic or idea, and should reflect familiarity with the magazine’s content and tone. Features are generally 1,500 to 5,000 words in length. Dispatches articles (100 to 800 words) cover timely news, events, issues, and short profiles. Destinations pieces (300 to 1,000 words) include places, news, and advice for adventurous travelers. Review articles (200 to 1,500 words) examine and evaluate outdoor gear and equipment.
Print Guidelines
Please send queries (not manuscripts) and two or three relevant clips along with a self-addressed stamped envelope to: Editorial Department, Outside magazine, 400 Market St., Santa Fe, New Mexico, 87501. If interested in your story, we will respond within six to eight weeks.
Photographers’ Guidelines
We rely on regular contributors for many images, but we are always open to innovative work that creatively reflects the essence of the magazine.
Features represent the best of outdoor writing and photography. Exposure is a gallery-style section devoted to showcasing exceptionally engaging photography and its creators. Parting Shot, the last image in the magazine, is a signature page that highlights a single image with a humorous twist.
Please send Exposure and Parting Shot submissions as low-res JPGs or a link to a web gallery to photo@outsidemag.com
To do a better job of presenting our content and integrating yours, we’ve redesigned the site’s look and structure, and we think you’ll find Outside Online easier and more fun to use in its new form. That form is constantly evolving, so let us know what you’d like to see. We not only welcome your feedback, we rely on it. We hope you share our excitement about Outside Online and its endless possibilities. Please return often to participate and watch us continue to grow.
Write about something you have had forever.
Write about your oldest possession.
You could also write about your earliest memory.
I have had this rocking chair since I was two years old. I used to rock in it while watching I Love Lucy on our black and white television set. I lent it to my sister when her children were little. Then my three children enjoyed it. And now, my granddaughter reads her books while rocking.
The books: The Wonderful World of Oz and The Secret of the Old Clock . . those go way back. I spent hours captivated by Nancy Drew’s amazing sleuthing abilities and fascinated with the variety of characters in the Oz books. I was especially intrigued about how much time was spent for Dorothy and some of her companions to sleep or look for food. Time that could have been used to get them to their goals. Perhaps that’s where I learned patience and that books are a form of discovery and adventures into new worlds.
Your turn: Write about your oldest possession or an early memory.
Just write!
Today’s Writing Prompt: