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  • What does “show rather than tell” mean?

    Writers have been told to “show” rather than “tell.” Do you wonder what that means?

    Barbara Poelle, “Funny You Should Ask,” Writer’s Digest, September 2015 says this about that:

    Telling supplies information while showing explores information. In order to expand a narrative into more showing, think about the complete sensory experience of a scene.”

    If you rely on narrative, you run the risk of an “information dump,” where you give all the facts in a few sentences. Poelle suggests, and I agree, “Don’t fall into the trap of quickly getting information ‘out of the way’ so you can ‘get to the story.’ . . . Take your time to explore [the facts] through action, dialogue and the senses of the characters involved.”This way, you set the scene with a “kinetic feel.”

    All well and good, but what does this really mean?

    I played around with some scenarios:

    #1: I set my timer. I have thirty minutes to finish this blog post before starting dinner. My husband and I had to eat early so I could be at my writing workshop by 6:30 pm, my Monday evening commitment. In the old days, this would have been impossible, since there would have been carpooling for kids’ activities, overseeing homework and laundry.

    So, you know that I’m just as busy now as when the kids lived at home. But you don’t know how I feel about my current commitments nor how I feel about being an empty-nester. Now, I’ll try for a kinetic feel:

    #2: Twisting the dial on the timer to go off in thirty minutes, I settle into my cushy chair. Dinner would be easy, salad with whatever leftovers I can ferret from the fridge. My husband isn’t as picky as the kids were. Back in the day, it would have been pasta with marinara sauce and garlic French bread. Carbs for calories to sustain them through ballet, piano, baseball, soccer, basketball (depending on time of year) practice. Sometimes I miss the patter of sports-clad footwear and washing uniforms. I got so used to being interrupted, now I interrupt myself. I’ll be humming away, concentrating on a blog post when I must check Facebook. Twenty minutes later, I realize I need to prepare prompts for tonight’s writing workshop. Completely absorbed in creating clever and inspirational prompts, I remember I need to finish the blog post in time for tomorrow morning’s post. The timer dings, sending my heart racing. Gotta go.

    So, what’s the difference? #1 is an “information dump.” Not too much detail, just a list of facts. You might not be able to “see” or “feel” this scenario.

    #2:You can infer I am on deadline (setting the timer) and I am capable of cooking a nice dinner. You might imagine I miss the days when my activity-bound children needed me, but I’m pretty happy and content with my life now as an empty-nester with more me-time. #2 has more of my personality, so the reader might feel a connection . . a kinetic connection with me.

    Marlene and dreadsYour turn: Write about something you routinely do . . . implementing sensory detail. Go ahead. . . Write with gusto as you writhe in agony over what to expound. Just write!

    Candid shot of Marlene hard at work in her corner office. Can you see the wheels turning and steam rising as she madly meets deadlines with blog posts! Ignoring conventional punctuation, feeling free to dance along the page, her faux dreads keeping time to the muse.

  • Writer Advice: Scintillating Starts Contest

    Writer Advice announces its Fourth “Scintillating Starts” contest.

     $20 ENTRY FEE     —     3 PRIZES OF $100


    B. Lynn Goodwin, Writer Advice: Whether you’re writing fiction, memoir or another prose genre, entice us. Grab our attention. Make us want to know more. Give us reasons to care. Submit the opening (up to 1500 words) of your book (any prose genre).

    Your cover letter must include your contact information. We don’t need a summary nor your publishing history. We’re looking at the manuscript opening, not the query.

    This contest is for those who have not yet received a contract for submitted work.

    Send your work to Writer Advice through Writer Advice Submission Manager.

    Lynn Goodwin will respond like an agent or editor who is looking for good writing that will sell. You’ll get perspective and insight. The prizewinners will be published.

    Deadline: 11/10/15.

    B. Lynn GoodwinNote from Marlene: Don’t wait until the deadline to submit!  Lynn’s offer of perspective and insight about your submitted writing is very generous. But, if everyone waits until the deadline. . . well, I’m thinking you will get more substantial comments if you enter sooner than later. So . . . get your piece as polished as you can and submit soon!

    If you type “B. Lynn Goodwin” in the “Search for” box on the home page of The Write Spot Blog, you will find articles by Lynn that have been featured here.

  • Change. Prompt #182

    Writing Prompt: Change

    Or: Changes or Change is coming or Change is about to happen.

    What do you have to say about change?

    Do you like change? Hate it?

    ChangeWhat about that change jingling in your pocket or purse?

    Write about change.

     

  • The Often Over-looked Magic of the Nose

    Guest Blogger Hoby Wedler writes about: The Often Over-looked Magic of the Nose: Exploring Smells Around You

    I was born blind. Growing up as a blind child forced me to pay closer attention to my nose than perhaps most people learn as children. I use my nose as a method of observing my surroundings, for navigation, to note whether or not food has spoiled, and most importantly to smell, taste and describe food and wine.

    It is important to note that not all blind people pay as close attention to their noses as I do. Many of my blind friends walk right past unique aromas that I easily pick up on. Thus, my love for thinking about aroma certainly does not stem specifically from my blindness.

    While I love describing aromas of many things, I notice whether they are pleasant, unique, off-putting, etc. I will use this opportunity to describe aromas of a few relatively common areas that I find exciting. I am a part-time wine educator and so I pay close attention to smells. I have found that the best way to get people excited about wine is to describe its aroma and flavor using common things or places they are familiar with. Here are a few of my aroma descriptions to give you a “taste” of how I enjoy describing aroma.

    Bars have a bizarre smell because they smell clean to me but also like people. I’d describe the aroma of a bar as a mixture of the type of cleaner they use (usually bleach to keep sanitation), citrus fruit, alcohol fumes, leather (not sure why this one is so present), usually old wood, people, sometimes cigarette smoke, and paper money. I know this is a bit esoteric and strange but it’s the best description of bar smell I could come up with. There are some bars in downtown Petaluma that I think of as having fairly iconic smells. Andresen’s on Western and Volpi’s on Washington come to mind right off.

    Other places that have very distinct aromas are banks, movie theatres, coffee shops (of course), parks with lawn and water features, swimming pools (and I’m not talking about right up next to the pool; I am able to identify the pool just by driving by the center where it’s housed), print shops, dry cleaning establishments, to name a few specific places.

    If we just focus on our vision, I think we lose all of what we’re discussing to our visual distractions. I’ve spent a long time pinning down the smells of different things I encounter in my day to day life and I find it to be thought-provoking and intriguing.

    Being able to describe aroma is like learning a new language. People need to develop an aromatic vocabulary. Smell is another language. For example, if you look at a picture of a dog, you might think of a furry thing that runs around and goes “Woof.” If you look at a picture of a ripe fig, you might think of the fruit and what you know about it. If I hand you a glass with crushed fig in it, however, it may be much harder to come up with the word “fig.” With practice and attentiveness to the nose and aromas, anyone can develop a strong aromatic vocabulary.

    Note from Marlene: I had quite an enjoyable email exchange with Hoby stemming from my inquiring if he could describe the “bar smell.” Pinning down that particular smell fascinates me. Hoby came up with leather (yes, leather-topped barstools and booths), wood (of course: stools, chairs, bar top) and money (aha! I hadn’t thought of that). Perspiration. . . (oh, yes,) and cigarette butts in tin can ashtrays, stale beer. I hadn’t thought of using a variety of material to describe “bar smell.” Now, I know . . . use my nose to play detective and capture precise smells. Thanks, Hoby!

    I have known Hoby since he was born. As I researched material for this post, I learned more about Hoby that I didn’t know. I am amazed by this remarkable young man and his family. If you have time, click on the links to learn more about opportunities for the visually impaired, what growing up blind was like for Hoby and his family and his zest for life. Hoby credits Learning Ally for being a life-changer.

    Hoby WedlerHenry “Hoby” Wedler is a fifth-year Ph.D. candidate at the University of California, Davis, founder and director of the nonprofit Accessible Science, and host of truly blind wine and beer tasting experiences. Hoby was raised in Petaluma, California where early on he fell in love with beautiful Sonoma County.  When he’s not busy working towards his Ph.D. in organic chemistry or leading his blind or visually impaired chemistry camp students in conducting lab experiments through touch and smell, he turns his attention to wine and beer – where he’s passionate about wine and beer flavor, accurate flavor descriptors, and how wine and beer flavor and aroma relate to chemistry.

    In May of 2012, Hoby was one of only fourteen individuals honored at the White House as part of President Obama’s Champions of Change program, for leading the fields of science, technology, engineering, and math (STEM) for people with disabilities.  The Champions of Change program was created as a part of President Obama’s Winning the Future initiative that recognizes outstanding individuals for the work they are doing to serve and strengthen their communities.

    Hoby was inspired by programs offered by the National Federation of the Blind in high school, and with encouragement from professors, colleagues and others, he gained the confidence to challenge and refute the mistaken belief that STEM fields are too visual and, therefore, impractical for blind people.

    Hoby founded and teaches at an annual chemistry camp for blind and low-vision high school students. Chemistry Camp demonstrates to the students, by example and through practice, that their lack of eyesight should not hold them back from pursuing their dreams.

    Hoby hosts Tasting in the Dark, a completely blind wine tasting experience at Francis Ford Coppola and other Napa-Sonoma wineries. The surprising and enlightening wine tasting, where guests are blindfolded, explores how flavors and aromas in wine are accentuated when experienced in complete darkness. Hoby believes that when a sighted person is in complete darkness, he or she feels more vulnerable and his or her senses become more heightened because vision is not a distraction, bringing out more flavors in a wine or beer.

    In 2013, Hoby partnered with Sierra Nevada Brewing Company to host beer tasting in the dark, “Sightless Sipping.” This event, similar to blind wine tasting, allows guests to enjoy beer at an entirely new level. According to the Sacramento Bee Newspaper:

    Hoby Wedler is a rising star

  • Tattoos . . . Prompt #181

    tattooWhat do you think about tattoos?

    Do you have a tattoo?  What is it? Where is it? Why?

    If you don’t have a tattoo, would you ever get one? If yes, what do you envision it will be?

  • Start at the height of desire — David Lavender

    Many of us have heard “start your story in the middle of the action, or the height of the conflict.”

    David Lavender suggests “start at the height of desire.”

    You need not worry about being dull if you can present within the first few hundred words a definite character in the grip of a definite emotion.

    “But introducing a character and his motives to an audience must be done deftly and without explanation. For example, if setting up a boy-loves-girl story, Lavender says, ‘I must show the boy immediately engaged in wanting the girl. I must do it with unobtrusive little touches. I must bring it out through the way he acts and what he says, being at all times careful not to let the reader guess that he is having something explained to him.’” — Nicki Porter, August 2015 The Writer magazine

    Argue

  • Sensory Details – Kinesthetic, motion in writing

    How do we convey the sense of touch, or feel, or kinesthetic (motion) in writing?

    “The key to good imagery is engaging all five senses.” Five Types of Imagery:

    “The five senses: visual, auditory, kinesthetic, olfactory (smell), and gustatory (taste).”

    Previous posts about using sensory detail in writing:  visual, auditory and olfactory.

    Now, let’s explore using the sense of touch to embellish and enhance writing.

    Sometimes, the best way to learn is by example, learning from what others have written.

    “At school, the guilt and sadness were like wearing clothes still damp from the wash,” and “Whenever I moved, I felt as though I were touching something icy.” —Family Life by Akhil Sharma

    I know what that feels like, so when I read this, I can feel those damp clothes and know what the author wants to convey.

    Here’s an example of using movement in writing:

    “By the thirteenth loop, my hands were cement-scuffed and my head was spinning from being at knee height for so long, but the parade of hoping, bear-crawling, push-upping women showed no sign of slowing.” — Natural Born Heroes by Christopher McDougall, describing parkour (a training discipline using movement developed from military obstacle course training.)

    McDougall could have written “I was worn-out” or “I was tired.”  Instead he uses specific details: “cement-scuffed” and “my head was spinning.” He employed strong verbs: “bear-crawling” and “push-upping.”

    With this type of strong writing, readers can feel the chafed hands and most of us probably can relate to “head-spinning.” I can see “bear-crawling” and “push-upping.”

    A note about parkour: “Practitioners aim to get from one point to another in a complex environment, without assistive equipment and in the fastest and most efficient way possible. Parkour includes running, climbing, swinging, vaulting, jumping, rolling, quadrupedal movement, and other movements as deemed most suitable for the situation.” — Parkour, Wikipedia

    Looking at websites about physical activities (martial arts, gymnastics,dance, etc) could help you find action verbs.

    In Vex, Hex, Smash, Smooch, Let Verbs Power Your Writing, Constance Hale regales readers with her unique style about usage of the English language, especially strong verbs.  Constance has been dubbed “Marion the Librarian on a Harley, or E. B. White on acid.” Kathy Myers wrote an excellent review of Vex, Hex, Smash, Smooch.

    Practice using strong verbs and specific descriptive words to make your writing strong and create images the reader can see and sense.  You can go to Parkour Images, choose a photo and describe it, using sensory detail. Just write!

    Parkour

    Basic Parkour Movements

  • Chicken Soup for the Soul always looking for new talent

    Have you wondered how Chicken Soup for the Soul chooses their stories? Do you have a story you think might qualify for selection for being published? What you need to know about Chicken Soup submissions:

    Recipe for A Winning Chicken Soup for the Soul submission

    A Chicken Soup for the Soul story is an inspirational, true story about ordinary people having extraordinary experiences. It is a story that opens the heart and rekindles the spirit. It is a simple piece that touches our readers and helps them discover basic principles they can use in their own lives. These stories are personal and often filled with emotion and drama. They are filled with vivid images created by using the five senses. In some stories, the readers feel that they are actually in the scene with the people.

    Chicken Soup for the Soul stories are written in the first person and have a beginning, middle and an end. The stories often close with a punch, creating emotion, rather than simply talking about it. Chicken Soup for the Soul stories have heart, but also something extra—an element that makes us all feel more hopeful, more connected, more thankful, more passionate and better about life in general. A good story causes tears, laughter, goose bumps or any combination of these.

    Submit Your Story

    Visit the Chicken Soup Story Guidelines page, which will answer many questions about subject matter, length, and style. Following these guidelines will give you the best possible chance of being accepted.

    For a list of current topics, complete with descriptions and deadlines, please visit: Possible Book Topics page.

    Chicken SoupNote from Marlene: Don’t worry if “your” topic isn’t listed. Check every month or so, your topic might be on their new list. Follow submission guidelines.

    When submitting, it’s very important to follow submission instructions. Do exactly what they want. If you don’t, your piece will be disqualified no matter how fantastic the writing is.

    Chicken Soup for the Soul is “always looking for new talent.” That’s you, my friend. Keep writing and revising and have your piece ready when your topic pops up.

  • Imagine you are . . . Prompt #180

    Palm treeImagine you are on a tropical paradise vacation.

    Sitting on the lanai, hearing the waves lap against the shore.

    Smell the ocean breeze.

    Feel the soft wind on your face.

    See the light curtain billow in the gentle breeze.

    Settle back in your rattan chair, cool refreshing drink nearby.

    Hear the ice clink against the side of your glass as you sip your refreshing drink.

    Hear the gentle wind chimes.

    Breathe deeply, enjoying the fragrance of fresh, tropical flowers – the heady scent of orchids, plumeria, roses. Perhaps pink, climbing roses.

    OrangesSee a piece of fruit. . . an orange. Feel the bumpy, heavy skin. Peel it. Feel the texture of the orange free of its heavy skin. See the uniform sections connected into a symmetrical arc of segments . . . .a globe. Carefully, slowly pull on one of the segments. So slowly that you see the burst of juice that squirts out. Inhale. Smell the refreshing fragrance that erupts as the orange is broken into segments.

    Prompt: Write about a favorite time that involved family, friends or food.

    Or: Write about a vacation.

    Just Write!

  • There was a smell of Time in the air . . .

    Excerpt from The Martian Chronicles by Ray Bradbury:There was a smell of Time in the air tonight.

    What did Time smell like? Like dust and clocks and people. And if you wondered what Time sounded like, it sounded like water running in a dark cave and voices crying and dirt dropping down upon hollow box lids, and rain. Time looked like snow dropping silently into a black room or it looked like a silent film in an ancient theatre one hundred billion faces falling like those New Year balloons down and down into nothing. That was how Time smelled and looked and sounded.

    HourglassMarlene’s Musings: I love the idea of writing what Time smells like. . . sounds like . . . looks like. . .

    Your Turn: Choose an item, an object, a thing, that interests you. . . what does it smell like? sound like? look like?